Interview on gf bf

Story I

E: Do u have a boyfriend?
C: I have.

E: Is he working Locally?
C: No. He is working Overseas.

E: Sorry, my company cannot employ u !
C: Why?

E: U will not be able to settle down here permanently. And my Company don't want to pay extra expenses on the Overseas calls just because of u.




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Story II

E: Any girl friends?
C: No.

E: So far chased any before?
C: Have, but not successful.

E: Ever think of getting a job first then start looking for a girlfriend?
C: Career is first priority. Currently didn't want to consider This personal issue.

E: Sorry, my company cannot employ u.
C: Why?

E: You are lacking of P.R skills and confidence!!




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Story III


E: Any girlfriends?
C: Yes.

E: Is she pretty?
C: Not quite.


E: Sorry, my company cannot employ you.
C: Why? Will this affect your company's reputation?

E: No, it does not affect the company's reputation but because My company is dealing with arts, our company requested an artist.


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Story IV

E: Any girlfriends?
C: Yes.

E: Is she pretty?
C: yes

E: Is she your first lover?
C: Yes.

E: Sorry, we can't employ you because you lack of fighting spirit.


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Story V


E: Any girlfriends?
C: Yes.

E: Is she your first lover?
C: No. Have a few already.

E: Sorry, my company cannot employ you because you are a "grasshopper"! (Job hoper lah!)


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Story VI


E: Any boyfriends?
C: Yes.

E: Is he rich?
C: No.


E: Then sorry, my company cannot employ you because our Company is dealing with money and you will seduce.


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Story VII

E: Any boyfriends?
C: Yes.

E: Is he rich ?
C: Yes, very rich.He owns a company.

E: Sorry, we cannot employ you because your boyfriend don't Even want to employ you, neither do we!
C: But,...... There is no position in his company.

E: Then,..... What is your qualification?
C: Secretary!


E: Sorry, we still cannot employ you because your prettiness Will affect your managers' working spirits.
C: But,...... I am not pretty at all.


E: It is even worse because my managers will not be interested In you!!

Foolish ppl

Interviewer : Give me the opposite words.

Banta Singh : Ok

Interviewer : Made in India

Banta Singh : Destroyed in Pakistan

Interviewer : Good... Keep it Up

Banta Singh : Bad.... Put it Down

Interviewer : Maxi Mum

Banta Singh : Mini Dad

Interviewer : Enough! Take your Seat

Banta Singh : Insufficient! Don't Take my seat

Interviewer : Idiot! Take your Seat

Banta Singh : Clever! Don't take my Seat

Interviewer : I say you get out!

Banta Singh : You didn't say I come in

Interviewer : I reject you!

Banta Singh : You Appoint me

Interviewer : ...!!!!!!!

Honest HR Question & their Answers

Honest HR Question n their Answers
If we were to Honestly reply to all the HR Questions they would go something like this (wondering what d reaction of d Interviewer wud b!):

1. Why did you apply for this job?
A: I have applied for many jobs along with this and you called me now...
2. Why do you want to work for this company?
A: I have to work for some company who ever gives me a job, I don't have any specific company in mind ...

3. Why should I hire you?
A: You anyways have to hire some one, you may give me a try ...

4. What would you do if we hire you?
A: Well, it depends on my mindset but I will try to work on whatever is allotted to me ...

5. What is your biggest strength?
A: Basically, daring to join any company who pays me well, without thinking of the fate of company...
6. What is your biggest weakness?
A: Girls
7. What was your worst mistake, and how did you learn from it?
A: Joining my earlier company and learn that I need to jump to get more money, so I am here today! ...

8. What accomplishments in your last position are you most proud of?
A: Had I accomplished any in my last position, why do I need to change my job? I could demand more and stay there...

9. Describe a challenge you faced and how you overcame it?
A: Biggest challenge is answering the question "why are you looking for a change" and I started blabbering irrelevantly to overcome that...

10. Why did you leave/ are you leaving your last job?
A: For the same reason why you left your earlier job... More money!...

11. What do you want from this job?
A: Even if no work is given, keep giving good hikes ...

12. What are your career goals and how do you plan to achieve them?
A: Make more money and for that, keep jumping companies for every 2 yrs...

13. Did you hear of our company and what do you know of us?
A: Yeah, I know that you will ask this, I've gone through your website ...

14. What is the salary expected and how do u justify that?
A: Well, no one will change job for the same salary, hence, give me 20% extra than what I am getting and that is unpublished industry standard (I know you will bargain on what ever I ask, hence, I have already hiked my current salary by 30% !!!!)